Strange, Non-Waterfowl Day Wishes from Chumley Masticar

Hello, everyone! Chumley Masticar here again! I thought I’d pop back in for a bit since my author is In Over Her Head, heavily at work on Rod’s story edits and Angel’s story creation—not to mention getting that strange, non-waterfowl ready for the big day tomorrow.

Thank the gods you Humans go for the winged type for your celebrates. I’ll tell you, those Italians and their Feast of the Seven Fishes have the Undersea World in an uproar every December. But at least in November we can rest somewhat easily—although I did hear of one instance where someone actually brought salmon to a turkey dinner. Can you imagine? How un-American! (Though the salmon was from Alaska, not somewhere out in the Wild Blue Under, so perhaps that counts? And, no, Sarah Palin was not the culprit!) Sadly, too, the salmon was not the guest...

I don’t know. You all have such strange holidays. Crushed cocoa beans mixed with sugar cane that you pass out in plastic wrappers at night, in the dark, in the cold? I don’t get it. Do you know how much damage plastic can do to the environment? Good thing Rod’s working on that for you.

Then there’s that interesting phenomenon of hiding the eggs of other strange, non-waterfowl in springtime. Hate to break it to you, folks, but that’s not how you make new fowl. (Check out Reel and Erica’s story for pointers in that arena.) And I do hope you find all of those eggs. Just sayin’…

The unleavened bread is good, if I do say. Yes, so maybe a few of you hoard it to feed to the ducks, but you have to know bits and pieces make their way out of duck-reach, so I say, keep 'em coming!

I’ve heard your turkey day is the biggest food extravaganza for Humans in your country, full of mashed potatoes (whatever those are), stuffing (I’m not even going to guess!), yams…?, corn—now this I do know. Ducks like to eat corn, so I’ll get a nibble every so often and I have to say the kind in butter sauce is the best. The pies are okay, but I’ll just stick to the crust, if you don’t mind.

Hmm…all this talk of food has made me hungry. I think I’ll go see what’s for lunch—and, no, I won’t tell you what I eat. Trust me, it’s not anywhere near as good as what you’ll be having.



I still don't see how anyone could call this strange bird the Catch of a Lifetime, but whatever floats your boat...

Happy Strange, Non-Waterfowl Day, Humans!