Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Convention Time!

By the time this blog goes live, I will have attended, partied, and come home from Barbara Vey's Readers for Life Luncheon. There will be lots of pictures on my Facebook page but for the moment, let me tell you a little about the joys and sorrows of readers events from an author's point of view.

1. The greatest thing about going to readers events is...

a. having a perfect business expense to leave home, stay in a hotel, and hang out with friends.
b. road tripping with Elizabeth Hoyt which, let's face it, makes it awesome for anyone.
c. putting on make up and high heels and pretending like I look this good all the time
d. being an extrovert because I AM! I like to party, party, party! Sorry if you're an introvert.
e. giving away a ton of gifts. I get to play "lady bountiful" and give #Squidge to lots of people.
  1. A rich and generous woman.
  2. (derogatory) An over-patronising woman, showing off her wealth by acts of 'overwhelming' generosity.
f. All of the above, but most important--meeting new people.

Yeah, yeah, you all know it's F. But seriously, hanging with Elizabeth Hoyt--fun. Also talking books is fun. And seeing their faces when they pick up Squidge and say, um, so what is it? is alway a great joy.

2. The worst thing about going to readers events is...

a. high heels and spanks. Oy. Who invented these things?
b. trying to have great conversations in the middle of a room of 500 women all having great conversations. Can you say: what did you say?
c. arriving and finding out that your clothes/books/swag didn't.
d. arriving and finding out that the hotel reservation never happened. Fortunately, Milwaukee has more than one hotel.
e. road tripping with Elizabeth Hoyt after 9 hours in the car and 45 potty stops. She's fun, but she's not THAT fun.
f. Trying to figure out something witty, personal, and special to say when signing your book for the 500th time.
g. From Elizabeth Hoyt: Finding out you have 12 year old fans. Hmmm....
h. Realizing as you step off the elevator that it's supposed to be a costume event. My special conference costume is: author in a pantsuit. Damon Suede, on the other hand, just rubber cements on a set of horns and he's good to go.

i. All of the above, but that creepy, stalker fan who wants a pair of your underwear (preferably still dirty) is always a special torture.

Answer i. Fortunately, I've never personally experienced the request-for-underwear, but I have encountered a few fans who did not understand the need for personal space.

3. Where can you find Jade next and what will she give you?

a. absolutely nothing. She's cheap that way.
b. Who knows? That's why GPSs were invented. I only go where it tells me.
c. My schedule is found here http://jadeleeauthor.com/appearances and my next big event is the Romantic Times Convention
d. I'll be giving away all of the following: squidge, tree frogs, notebooks, my books in print, my books in e, and Elizabeth Hoyt's clean underwear.

Answer: C!  But I will give away #squidge, books, styluses, and a host of other fun things that do not include any underwear at all. (Though I will be wearing some, not for sale or gifting)


  1. Have a great time. Cannot wait to hear all about it.

  2. LOL I bet everyone enjoyed having you around!!

  3. You are a hoot...have fun at RT and think about me at home, green with jealousy because I can't be there and puffed up with pride when I hear my granddaughter deliver her salutatorian speech at her graduation.

  4. LOL! Love the stalker photo. I went to a parent conference at my daughter's school today, and everyone was like, you look so nice! I had on make-up. Guess I need to step up my every day game!

  5. Jade, great blog! I don't know what I had me laughing more: the stalker drawing or option a) on list #2. I think I have heels somewhere in my closet still.

  6. Glad you had fun. Like your lists.

  7. I would love to go to a convention one day. If this is the spot to register for the books and swag, count me in.

    Natalie's Mama

  8. You brighten up any room you are in, Jade (yes, I still hear "Jade Lee rocks" in my sleep from several years ago, lol). Have a great time...and when the personal space thing gets too onerous...just say, "I hope your doctor won't have trouble figuring out what it is if you catch what I have"...(snicker)