posted by Loucinda McGary aka Aunty Cindy
Today in the US it is "Tax Day," the deadline for everyone to file their federal tax returns.
I'm sorry to say that yer olde Aunty is going to be hard pressed to find anything humorous about paying taxes, and I do not think there is anything remotely funny about the Internal Revenue Service. (I survived an audit once and remain scarred and scared for life!)
Hmmm, come to think of it, there is not much inherently humorous about Aunty's books, which center largely around murder and mayhem -- not very funny subjects (though certainly not unfamiliar to the IRS).
Okay, are you sensing a theme here? While Aunty does indeed possess a puckish sense of humor, I do not 'write funny.' I leave that to several of the lovely Casababes whose books are quite funny -- intentionally.
All right, now that we are clear on that, I will admit that while I may not be a humorous writer, one thing I do have going for me is SNARK! You know what I mean -- those witty if somewhat acerbic comments made at the most inopportune moments. I'm afraid it's a genetic anomaly since most of my relatives, especially my siblings, seem to possess the same propensity. As my Gramma used to say, we all "have a mouth on us."
In fact, I'm sure that somewhere in the mists of the auld sod lies the undiscovered motto of the McGarys. Translated from the Gaelic, I'll bet it reads: When in doubt, bring on the snark!
I suppose it was only natural for my characters to occasionally lapse into snarky dialogue in spite of the murder, mayhem, and otherwise deadly serious events going on around them.
Here's a little example from The Wild Sight between Donovan and his brother-in-law Sean. Everyone has been at the hospital all night because Donovan's father has suffered a stroke:
“There’s been no change for hours and we’re all exhausted,” Sean argued, pressing his house key into his brother-in-law’s hand. “You and your wee Yank go catch a few winks in the guest room, whilst I drag your sister home by the hair of her head if I have to.”
“Good luck with that,” Donovan muttered.
And then there's this little exchange in The Treasures of Venice between Keirnan and his sister Kathleen:
“You’d bloody well better believe I object!” Kathleen declared, ignoring his warning as always. She shook her finger at him. “You can’t use the Jewels of the Madonna as some…some bargaining chip!”
“Well, pardon me for saving your lily-white neck!” Keirnan laid sarcasm on thick. “I wasn’t sure which part of you those thugs would carve off next, so I suppose I wasn’t thinking too clearly.”
As he’d hoped, that seemed to take a little of the wind out of her sails. She muttered a rude phrase in Italian, though she spared him the accompanying hand gesture.
Pretty snarky, right? Well, these two have nothing on my latest pair of fictional siblings in The Wild Irish Sea. Inspired by my own brothers, the heroine's twin brother, Parker O'Neill is the king of snark. Here's a little sample of Parker's verbal sparring with his sister:
Amber crossed her arms and put on her stern teacher persona, quite a trick considering the circumstances. “Just give me your clothes. All of them."
“What am I suppose to wear in the meantime?” Parker complained, but he unbuttoned the shirt all the same.
Amber opened the top bureau drawer. “You can put on some of Kevin’s clothes.”
“A shirt’s okay, but I draw the line at wearing some other guy’s underwear.” Parker paused for two heartbeats before he added, “Even if you are in love with him.”
...He pulled a pair of sweatpants from the far side of the closet. “Turn your head,” he ordered his sister. “Unless you want a peep show. I’m about to go commando under these sweats.”
I hope you'll enjoy reading more of Parker and his snarky remarks when The Wild Irish Sea hits the shelves on July 6th!
So what about you? Do you have any snarky people in your life? Love 'em or hate 'em? Or do you yourself sometimes bring on the snark? And most important of all -- Have you filed your taxes?!?!
If you don't want to wait until July 6th to read more of The Wild Irish Sea, I'm holding a contest to give away an ARC. Just send me proof that you've purchased one of my other books, or email me to answer three easy questions about either The Wild Sight or The Treasures of Venice. Please contact me through my website: www.LoucindaMcgary.com
The fine print: A winner will be randomly chosen on May 4, 2010. Void where prohibited by law. You must be 18 years or older to enter. No prize substitution permitted. Odds of winning are determined by number of entrants. This contest is subject to all federal, state and local laws and regulations.